130 Amanda

Amanda (52 yrs)

Dose 1: Pfizer-BioNTech 25th August 2021

Covid Vaccine Reaction.

25, August 2021 First Covid vaccine, Drive through clinic.

Within seconds of having the vaccine my face came over in a hot flush. I couldn’t speak or move my jaw. I reached for a rescue remedy in my glovebox (thought I was having a panic attack). I couldn’t chew it and had to spit it out. My vision seemed frozen somehow and I felt zoned out or like my entire being froze. During this time my two daughters were having their vaccinations through the window in the back seat. I was unable to turn around and comfort them as couldn’t speak or move as I felt outside my body. As quickly as it came on, it passed, and I nervously started the car to drive forwards to the 15 minute wait park. The admin nurse asked if I was okay, she had noticed I was odd and was staring at me. I replied, “I’m not sure but think so now”. So, I pulled up to the wait area.

We had been to the supermarket earlier so the girls got out some food and we all had a snack. Approximately 8 minutes in to the 15 minute wait time in the recovery area, when completely relaxed and glad it was over, my hands started trembling. Very fast trembling/shaking. My heart started racing very fast. I felt like I was going to blackout and reached for my phone to call 111. It was my immediate response to call 111 not honk the horn, unsure why!! Then the nurse appeared at my window to say the 15 minutes was up and we could leave if okay. I showed her my hands. She said “oh dear that’s not right”. I told her my heart was racing and I could feel it racing quite strongly. She took my pulse and said I had to wait a further 15 minutes. She went over to the other staff in PPE and talked to them and pointed at my car. After waiting a further 15 minutes I decided to leave, I still had the symptoms but no longer felt like passing out. My heart was still fast and hands still shaky but felt a bit better. I drove straight to my doctor’s clinic and stayed there for 40 minutes in the car park as a precaution. Once all symptoms stopped, I drove home.

4 days later, at midnight I woke with the most terrifyingly strong and pounding heartbeat going very fast. I felt like I was going to die. I asked my kids to call an ambulance but, in the panic, they forgot our address and froze. I could see they were terrified and crying so I downplayed it, told them not to worry and eventually it calmed down. The next day I went to my GP who ran tests and said it was obvious I had had a reaction to the vaccine and that it was my bodies fight or flight response. They were unsure if it was an allergic reaction to the Spike Protein or what it was. The Dr then said irrespective of the reaction it was more important than ever to have the second vaccine but to wait 7 to 8 weeks for it to give my body a bit more time.

For 8 to 11 weeks, I experienced these heart episodes. I couldn’t sleep on one side as it made it worse. Before toileting it would happen. Any exercise or lifting heavy objects. Even certain foods I felt made it happen. After 7-10 days the skin around my eyes turned yellow. Then the skin all peeled off and was dry and split. Several weeks in, my left thigh became very large. I went to the Dr and was sent for a scan to check for a blood clot. No blood clot was found. The swelling lasted several months then went away on its own. That leg could only just fit in my jeans whereas the other leg was an easy fit. I cried on the scan table and the radiologist was close to tears too after seeing the state of me, finding no cause and hearing my story.

Every Friday after the 7/8 week period after the first vaccine, I was booked at the Drs to have my second. Every Friday I left without it, in floods of tears as could not go through with it. The Drs had arranged for me to stay at the surgery for several hours afterwards to be monitored but I didn’t feel safe even with that. I asked what they would do if it happened again and they said “send you to hospital to slow your heart down”. But the thought of going through it again overcame me and I never had the second vaccine.

I have never felt the same since. And the psychological damage was so devastating. My girls were affected, and it put huge stress on them and my family. I felt ashamed and people lost respect for me as vaccine reactions were only for nutters and antivaxxers (in their eyes) and I was labelled paranoid and deluded. The worst was the Dr encouraging me for further vaccines saying the spike protein in the virus would probably kill me if that’s what the spike protein in the vaccine did. So I became terrified of covid and terrified of not having more vaccines and the two combined equated to me being stuck in the middle either dying of another vaccine or dying of the virus and my mind was a washing machine as both choices ended up with the same possible risk.

I am unsure if the vaccine may have been injected directly into my bloodstream or if it was put in the muscle. I believe it affected my heart and my liver and am unsure why my thigh swelled. My experience with the covid vaccine was enough to believe it was not safe and a gamble. I feel lucky to be alive and try not to dwell on the permanent damage it has more than likely done to my heart and liver and overall wellbeing.

On hindsight, if I was more aware of the side effects and risks and the amount of reactions people were having, I would have gone straight to hospital and asked for heart monitoring over a 24/48 hour period, full bloods and every possible test. My family and myself should have been supported through this entire event, medically, emotionally, and financially as the medical bills piled up. But mostly, medically!!!