My name is JANE and I am an anti-vaxxer

I am an ANTI-VAXXER…. At least that’s what I’m told I am. I am also the partner of a vaccine injured person whom I had to call an ambulance for back in September 2021 without which he would have died.

I have NEVER been anti vax. Our child has had all his immunisations on schedule. I had also just prior to 2021 had my tetanus booster.

But – I wasn’t scared of Covid. I have a family member in England who has COPD. She caught the Alpha strain…she did not even require any medical care and recovered fine.
I knew the IFR for this virus was very low and also know that a virus mutates to become more transmissable but less deadly.

My partner also felt the same but was coerced into taking a vaccine when he had his yearly medical for work. We both knew at this point that the vaccine was not going to halt transmission, I was also very aware Myocarditis was an early issue, so I was slightly concerned but didn’t realistically think anything untoward was going to happen.

How wrong was I ?

I challenge the person reading this to experience what I and my then 7 yo son experienced when we woke at 4am to find my partner collapsed in the bathroom. Blood everywhere from knocking himself out and unable to wake him.

The Paramedics treated him as a drunkard as soon as I mentioned he had just recently been vaccinated. I would like to add that one Paramedic was lovely. Her colleague however, as soon as I mentioned the vaccine walked out of the house and refused to help.
He was in the Emergency Dept at ➖➖ hospital for 8+hours whilst the emergency staff fought to get his BP under control. It was so low when the Paramedics finally got a reading, they were shocked he even had a pulse – to extremely high when he got to the hospital, he was a prime candidate for a heart attack apparently. He also sustained minor kidney damage.

I mentioned the vaccine to several health staff and was mocked that I could even consider it and was told he had just stood up too quickly, to he was dehydrated and then told anxiety was the reason that I had to call an ambulance out at 4am !!

Only by the grace of God was Myocarditis finally admitted by a doctor when my partner was admitted to the Medical ward.
I had the distinct impression he was terrified to say anything negative about the vaccine. It was my awareness of this adverse reaction which prompted him to admit it.

I firmly believe my partner would have been discharged that same day had I not known. Just like many other people I have since come to realise were. People who are now my friends.

When he was discharged 2 days later, we were told by a nurse they would mail his discharge papers out to him as the doctor was busy elsewhere and couldn’t be found.
When they finally arrived, Myocarditis as a diagnosis had not been recorded. We did not follow this up as I had already been made aware from a support group I was in, that this would happen and that it was a regular occurrence amongst the vaccine injured people I have since met.

I also filled out a CARM report which to this day has not been followed up on as far as I am aware.

My partners GP advised him ‘off record’ not to have his booster. On record he told him he HAD to say “it was safe and effective ” and also that he could not issue him an exemption as it had been taken out of the doctors hands and to not waste his time in trying because it would get refused.

(Primary doses given 03/08/2021 and 28/08/2021 Hospitalised 07/09/2021.)

Several weeks later, as a Caregiver. I got mandated.

If our experience had been better at the hospital and they had been more transparent regarding his injury, perhaps it would have put my mind at rest somewhat and who knows, perhaps I would have got vaccinated, if it meant I could keep my job. Yet, I had the Prime Minister stating this vaccine was very safe. Apparently people talking about vaccine harms were conspiracy theorists and listening to misinformation, I had the media encouraging everyone to hate on people like me. I had friends stop speaking to me. I also had my employer calling me on a daily basis, telling me I had to inject something with no long term safety data into my arm just weeks after my son had almost lost his father.

I was on stress leave for 3 weeks. If it wasn’t for the support of my family I don’t think I would be here now. I also had the added stress that my partner was possibly going to be mandated for his booster, which would have put the both of us out of work and unable to keep a roof over our heads. Thankfully his employers saw sense.

I, however, was unable to say goodbye to my residents as I would have been issued with a trespass notice if I went anywhere near my place of work. I was perfectly able to work before the vaccine got mandated and was not considered a threat to public health when I was a close contact of the Ruby Princess outbreak in 2020, I was still required to work.

Make it make sense.

17 years with the same company and I was treated like dirt. Punished by the Government because I refused something that wasn’t totally safe and was NOT effective.

Where there is risk there absolutely MUST be choice.

Choosing between my health and income to survive is NOT a choice.

Almost 3 years later I am still not over how we were treated. It has affected my daily life which in turn has impacted my son. He lost friends because their parents didn’t want to associate with an ‘anti vaxxer’ My self confidence is at an all time low and I struggle to find other work because I no longer like to be around people, and crowds.

I no longer trust our institutions. I have zero trust in Doctors now.

My partner was blue lighted to hospital again in January 2023. I had hoped that now Myocarditis is recognised as an adverse reaction, we may have got better treatment but we were still gaslighted. To this day I still have no idea whether he was ‘treated’ correctly and I worry constantly his heart may just give out one day.

His brother also had the same health issues which unfortunately now has gone into full blown kidney failure because he was never treated accordingly. He did not have someone to advocate for him. He believes his doctor when he tells him it was due to Covid ( which he has never even had ) he doesn’t believe me, he trusts his Doctor .

This is not how I imagined my life to be. We had dreams, we were fortunate enough to be in the position of being almost mortgage free. I now worry my son may grow up without his dad.

I am appalled I am still unable to work as a Caregiver. Despite what we now know, in that a vaccinated person can still get Covid. I still see vacancies for Caregivers…only vaccinated need apply !

I am no more of a threat than them but I am STILL considered ‘selfish’ and a walking virus.

Until there is more honesty about the harms that vaccines may cause, I will now no longer have anymore. The same with my son. That does not make me an anti vaxxer or a science denier. I am now an ex vaxxer and more vaccine aware. After my families experience I have had to be.

I blame the events of 2021 for that.

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View "Silenced" by Samantha Blanchard

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